Thursday, December 28, 2006

Milestone! Trinity is walking!

Yesterday in the office Gillian gave me a call: Mom!! Trin is walking! She walked all the way from the study to the bedroom without holding onto anything!

I felt a pang as I heard this. Why wasn't I around to see this happen?? So much for working half-time hoping to be there for the milestones when they happen. Instead I am stuck in the office coding new subjects, calling for meetings and editing proofs.

When we went home, true enough, Trin was walking. A bit hesitantly, but with a BIG grin on her face, she toddles around. No longer reaching to hold on to things, no longer dropping to her bum everytime something or someone is out of reach, no longer crawling.

There was no stopping her. She went everywhere on her own, thrilled by the mobility. We, on the other hand, had to keep an eye on her. Noticed that she was even stepping up the dining room step the 'normal' way and not crawling up. I kissed her little feet - thinking that they will very soon lost their baby softness and feel.

So I guess it's official - Trinity is walking. At the grand old age of 13months and 27 days. 27 Dec 2006.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Not a child, not yet a woman

It was 9pm and we were in our hotel room in Ipoh. Outside, it was raining heavily. KH and I watching a documentary on killer typhoons in our room, lazy to move after a great Ipoh hor fun dinner. The kids were hooked on Cartoon Network in their room. And thus it was when Gillian skidded into our room, and told me excitedly: mum! it's here! My period!!

Inwardly I go: No-ooooooooooooooo!

Talk about good timing. I don't feel prepared to deal with this. Not while we're on vacation! But who was I kidding - I didn't feel prepared to mother a kid high on puberty hormones! While we've covered the sex bit over the dinner table couple of moons ago, I'm not sure how much of that got through. Though I think now that all mothers worry about this and the truth is: not much really goes through. Couple of thoughts race through my mind. First - gotta find a sanitary napkin and fast! Second - er, is this where I regurgitate the no-sex until you're married lecture? Third - oh no, all that blood and staining!! And what about the Red Party I planned for her? All out the window!

Well, I follow her to the bathroom and have a peek. Yep. No kidding.

I head back to the room. KH raises his eyebrows in a question mark. I nod and he grins: OK, over to you then!

I call the Front Desk - is there a pharmacy open? No pharmacy but the mamak shop across the road is still open.

When I imagined Gillian getting her period, I did not bargain for this scenario: me dashing across the road in a heavy rain at night in a foreign country, buying a pack of sanitary napkins from a mamak shop. Looking at the two types of packages on the dusty shelf made me think wistfully of NTUC and the multiple shelves filled with blue, pink, wings, sleep, day, maxi, liners, tampons etc.

So back in the bathroom I teach her how to tape the pad on, how to dispose of it, how to clean her underwear etc. I also throw in a very fumbly speech on how her body is precious, how she is now a woman etc and of course, a couple of lines under the do-not-have-sex-until-you're-married header. I'm not sure that she took it all in. She seemed very excited and told me that she was scared. Here's my chance to be in the sensitive-mother mode but I blew it. I took the sensible and brisk approach and said: nonsense! Nothing to be scared of. You'll get used to it when things settle down.

Later I told KH: gee, I'm SO glad MY period didn't come! Thank God for lactational amenorrhea! Yay!!

Well, either God wasn't paying close attention when I thanked Him or He had a very bad sense of humour because the very next day, my period came!!

So both Gillian and I were sidelined for most of the holiday, nursing our periods, each of us having our own unique firsts - her first in a lifetime and my first after more than a year. It was lovely being period-free and now, geez, back to fumbling with the pads, the tampons etc. Maybe its time to get myself a mooncup - lulu, you reading this??

Interesting though - my daughter is now a woman. Sort of. Hard to think of her that way. Seems like just yesterday that she was a baby. And now, she's able to have her own babies. Wow.

I am writing this on Boxing Day. Gillian's first period started on 10th Dec and ended only yesterday, Christmas Day. 15 days and two-thirds of those were heavy flow with big clots. We went through about 4 boxes of sanitary napkins. I was concerned enough to bring her to the GP for a look. But the doc felt it was normal. I'll watch her though and see if this is the pattern.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas!

Isaac asked me the other day: hey mum, what are you most afraid of? Are you afraid of dying?

Thank God that among 5 kids, I have at least ONE introspective thinker/dreamer, a potential SNAG who would consider and talk about these issues! So I thought long and hard, wanting to seize the opportunity to share/nurture/teach. I said at last: well, I'm not afraid of dying. But I am afraid of losing the people I love, especially my family - all of you, who complete my life in so many ways. Where would I be without all of you children and your dad? Imagine life without family, without love...

Long pause. Then he went: err mum, actually I was just thinking of the normal things you're scared of - like you know, lizards? Bugs? Scary movies... That kind of stuff...

That kind of sums up my life.

Merry Christmas from the Chongs.

Friday, December 22, 2006

The Chong Road-trip highlights

Just back from 10 days on the road in Malaysia. Having five kids has seriously curtailed our travel options - even the cheapest budget flights now go into a couple of thousand dollars when you factor in the surcharges, taxes etc! So with no spare cash, we hit the road in Malaysia. And this has forced us to travel deeper into the country, exploring places beyond the usual KL-Malacca circuit.

This trip, we headed up north to Ipoh - a rather nondescript quiet town, now famous as location du jour for Lee Ang's new film and Ipoh hor fun. En route, we stopped at the Kuala Woh Recreational Forest, 13km up the winding foothills leading to Cameron Highlands, off the Tapah exit. There, we found only locals, no tourists, a rushing river shaded by banks of big trees, butterflies in black and green the size of our hands, and a creaky foot suspension bridge. It was a great break from the driving. We loved going on the suspension bridge, wading in the shallow pebble-filled river bed. And the river has hot springs! We discovered this by accident when Isaac yelped as his foot landed unsuspectingly into a hot spot. Further up the river was deeper water and big round boulders. So next trip, we're going swimming!

We also found a decent hotel in Ipoh where we made a comfortable base. We took two adjoining rooms which cost us RM260 a night for both rooms. The room was clean, hot shower worked well, the King-size beds comfy, they had cable tv(which was what the kids wanted) and the breakfast was pretty decent for a small hotel!

Previously, Ipoh was a problem when it came to accomodations - because the places there were just not value for money. Case in point was the run-down Station or Majestic Hotel (a real misnomer!) . It was the old railway station, built along splendid colonial lines and now converted into a hotel. But if you're thinking its the Raffles, think again. The rooms are dark and musty-smelling with no windows, the beds look sad and saggy and the first floor is a warren of massage parlours. The whole place has lost its shine and dignity and its a sad thing to see. And they charge RM200 for a family room - which is two queen-beds!! The last time we stopped here we stayed at the Seri Malaysia, off the main road leading to Ipoh town - and it had the scent of stale durians, the toilet seat was missing, the fridge didn't work and the aircon sucked. So this time, we were very pleased to find a decent place - it gave us reason to come to Ipoh as a place to break our journey up north.

Finally found the famous Ipoh hor fun - ribbons of white that just slides down the throat and chicken nicely poached smooth white! Trin ate everything we ate - down to the chicken, bean sprouts etc. She's always liked our food and hated baby food - the mashy cereal/porridgey stuff - which she always spat out so decisively. So on this trip, she ate everything we ate - her favourite being wanton noodles!

We explored the places around Ipoh - Kellie's Castle, Gua Tempurong etc. Liked the long road heading into the cave area - a long ribbon of grey, bright green fields and wetlands on either side, with a hulking limestone mountain looming up in front of us. The cave is do-able, but unfortunately, poorly lit. It had an underground river, a wind chamber (which was cooling after our long hikes up and down the many stairs and catwalks). So when the kids are older, we'll do the 4-hour hard stuff which includes navigating the underground river.

From Ipoh, we headed to Lumut, intending to cross over to the Pangkor Island Beach R esort. But after doing the sums, I felt that it was too expensive. It cost RM320++ for an Ocean wing and the hotel didn't allow us to all go into one room. It was adamant that we had to have two rooms. And this would have jacked up the cost significantly. And if we stayed one night, the hotel wanted to charge a one-night surcharge! So with all this hesitation, we decided to forget it, and just spend the night in Lumut, heading to Pangkor for a day trip in the morning.

Have to say that Lumut was a dead boring place. We chose to spend the night in the rather run-down Lumut Country Resort. It actually was not a bad place if properly maintained and managed. Nice black and white trim reminiscent of the colonial houses and good layout of the rooms with generous natural light. Cost us RM95 per room per night. We took two rooms. And I spent the whole night hearing light switches go on and off in mine, lots of dragging noises overhead, voices etc - even though I distinctly recall the manager telling us he was giving us a whole wing to ourselves! KH said his room was fine - didn't hear a thing. Go figure.

Pangkor was nice. My first view was of green wooded hills rising from a turquoise sea, wooden houses on beaches with coconut trees, long jetties with fishing boats bobbing away and once in a while, a glimpse of hot pink flashing through the trees. Those were the taxis. All the taxis on Pangkor are painted an exciting hot pink - and all are of the minivan variety, which was great for our large family.

The taxi driver recommended Telok Nipah on the other side of the island. We wended through forests, flanked by beaches on one side and trees and foliage rising from the other. Across the straits, I could see the very posh and expensive Pangkor Laut resort. Too rich for my blood but I figured - we share the same sea/strait so so much for exclusivity!

Telok Nipah was very nice - Gillian and I were landbound thanks to mother nature. But the rest went swimming. KH, at first sceptical about the waters in Pangkor, was won over when he could see shoals of little fishes swimming alongside him. The kids were ecstatic about finding sea-shells, crabs and jellyfish in the water. So we decided that the next trip up, we would stay on the island - either find cheaper (read crappier) accomodation or splurge for a bit of luxury. But we'll definitely be back.

Back on the mainland, we headed for KL where we spent a very nice and comfortable two days in our favourite Micasa Hotel. KL's highlight was a lovely dinner with everyone in my family - Mum, Dad, Paul, Aunty Peggy and Uncle Boris were in town, catching up with Vivian my sister who lives in KL. So we had a great dinner - lots of red meat, pasta and wine - and then headed back to her house to open presents. It was so rare to be able to gather with family like this in KL. The only one missing was the angmoh Paul, my BIL who had gone on his own road-trip, driving from KL up into the far reaches of Laos!

All in, great trip. We had good weather and came home to the torrential rains that eventually flooded out most of Johor and Malacca (still flooding as I write). Discovered new places, hung out with dear ones, made big emotional and physical transitions from girlhood to womanhood. Draining, but still good fun.

Friday, December 01, 2006

The Cops, the Plumber and the Husband...

...had a face off in the Riang corral last night. Neighbours peeked over fences surreptitiously. Or peered from their windows at the unfolding drama at the Riang corral last night.

Drama drama drama.

It started with a the gulley in the back wash area choking up and stinking up the house with the stench of bad drains, something long dead and decaying. Yeah, eeks...

So yours truly tried to help and decided to make a call to the plumber. Scanning the classified ads, it was a case of tikam-tikam or eeny-meeny-miney-mo as I looked for someone to call. I picked this innocuous ad that looked a tad more professionally done than others and which promised no obligation. It also stated they would come in half an hour etc.

First thing that struck me - the guy on the other end of the line sounded drunk (he was slurring or maybe I am being anal again). Second, he refused to give me his name and cross-examined me on my name, address etc without waiting to hear what my problem was. Third, he kept ignoring my requests for a verbal quote by rudely asking for my name etc. Finally, when pressed, he said it was free - they would just come and have a look. I double-checked and asked if they would charge for transport etc if they came and we decided not to do the job. He slurred that it was free, free, free lah! OK... Mr Slurry finally gave his name as Tay.

Now don't ask me WHY in heaven's name, if I felt so uneasy, that I said ok. As I went through the conversation, I had a premonition of disaster looming. But said ok I did and told the guy that I was leaving the house at 8pm (and I was - it was my night to watch the Amazing Race Asia!) and his man had to come before that.

KH came home and blanched when I told him what I had done. He sneered: they will want to do something and we will have to pay - mark my words! I was sniffy: well, they assured me they wouldn't.

Guess who had to eat her words?

8.15pm and a guy called - sounding more drunk and slurry than the guy on the line. Couldn't get head or tail out of him. That was the Plumber. Not a good sign.

8.40pm I called the hotline again and told Mr Slurry that I wanted to cancel. I had to leave and his man is nowhere in sight. He said I should have cancelled the appointment. My hackles raised, I told him that hello, I said before 8pm or forget it. Just then, like bad timing in a black comedy, a van pulls up.

Out steps Laurel and Hardy - one tall and thin and slurry. The other shorter and more coherent, dressed all in black.

KH was in a black mood by then and so was I. Showed the pair to the kitchen. KH went out back and told them in no uncertain terms: DO NOT DO ANYTHING.

The taller and thin old man whom I shall call The Plumber said:don't worry, just looking only. And KH shot back: if you want to look in a dirty drain, that's your business but DON'T DO ANYTHING.

Guy sticks a hand down the line and tells me - choked. Yes, I know, does not take rocket science to tell me that. Goes to the other opening, sticks a hand in there and says again: choked. And out runs a stream of cockroaches. (your hair standing yet?!) The atmosphere was heavy and I was very fed up so I took a newspaper and whacked all the six roaches dead. Made me feel a bit better.

Then the Plumber calls Mr Slurry on the phone. Came back with a quote of $220. I refused and told them to leave. They tried to bargain it down and did not want to leave. KH came back, yelled and waved his arms and told them to get out of our house. Incredibly, still did not want to leave. The Plumber kept (a) telling me to speak to his boss (b) lowering the price - it went from $220 to $180 to $150 to $130 and (3) asking me what my budget was. Play this loop in repeat mode for half an hour - yep, he kept standing in my kitchen refusing to leave and just kept on at it.

KH yelled and threatened to bodily evict him to no avail.

So we called the cops. KH took his tools and dumped them on the road outside the house. I walked to the front - realising that it would be just futile to engage in further debate. The Plumber followed me out - so that was a step in the right direction -out of my house I mean. Then the Plumber continued his loop-de-loop spiel and KH just stood there and asked him what was the company name, the address etc. To which the man refused to give and insisted that we will see the company name and address when a receipt is given after the job is done. And so on and so forth... Then he whined that he had travelled from Jurong (Not my problem when the number I called was in Toa Payoh and they had numbers for different districts in Singapore!) and had to answer to his boss, needed to eat, accused us of bullying the elderly etc. He threw in every argument he could think of! We just stood there and waited for the cops. No point talking.

Finally the cops came. Three of them - in multi-racial Singapore style - one Indian, one Malay and one Chinese. Wonder if this is intentional - do we send our patrol officers in this racial configuration so that they would be ready to face off with any criminal of any race??

They too, stood outside alternately bargaining, coaxing, threatening, negotiating etc with the Plumber. The other short guy who came with the plumber had quietly fled. The cops looked the ad where I called. Talked to me, then talked to Mr Slurry on the phone, and tried to persuade the Plumber to leave. This went a couple of rounds. Each of them took turns to talk to the guy. And after a while, you could see that even the cops were frustrated.

Finally, they said that it might be simpler if we just paid the Plumber $20 to get him off our premises.

I baulked but KH was tired and by then, it was close to 10pm. So he paid $20 and when the cops asked the Plumber for a receipt, the guy claimed he didn't have one! Yeah right...

Finally the guy left, the cops left and KH was left to clear the chokage.

We left the porch light on and the back light on the whole night, and the phone off the hook. In case the &*$#&^% decided to come back and vandalise our house or try anything funny.

I am beginning to think that this sort of scam is really common - they say no obligation in their ads or over the phone. But when they show up, they give an exhorbitant quote for the job, then bargain the price down or in our case, just refuse to leave until we pay some 'transport' money or 'checking fee'.

To me, this is cheating plain and simple. I did ask the cops if I could charge them for trespassing when they didn't want to leave. Or what about cheating? False advertising? They cops advised me that there was nothing they could do and if I wanted to pursue it, it had to go through a civil action.

I suspect most people just let it go. But while I am not going to let it go entirely, there are a couple of things I can do - not legal action, but I do want answers and I want to create awareness. So let me mull on this...

Guess I owe KH 20 bucks... and I still need to find a reliable plumber who will repair my leaky tap, my cistern and shower.